a quiet evening

Angus stared out the rain smeared window of the train, brow kneaded together with thought as he passed by familiar landscape. Outside, the sun was setting, the sky was a smoky dark purple as it mingled with the fading storm. Angus had seen this landscape far too much recently. 

There weren’t a lot of passengers on the train for the final stop this evening, Mt. Bougainvillea, where Angus was returning not long after the incident at the Hallo’Moon Faire. The thought of not returning crossed his mind, but only for the briefest flash in a state of weakness. 

His head was filled, jumbled with so many thoughts that he couldn’t properly think of anything at all. He didn’t know what he was going to say or do, and this feeling of cluelessness persisted even as he got off the train and trekked through town, cloaked, to the house that he knew Ravi resided in because of the last unfortunate tie that he had to this place. 

By the time he arrived, standing dumbfounded in front of the small house with warm light seeping from the partially opened windows, he still didn't know what to say. The sun had fully set and dusk was making way for the evening. 

Angus slowly made his way up the front pathway, up the steps that creaked beneath his hooves, and stood in front of the door. He raised his hand to knock, but it fell back down to his side after a brief moment of deliberation. 

He wondered if he should leave. If coming back would be a mistake, after the way he left things. All the courage he had during his adventures was sapped from him during moments like these, when he so desperately needed it most. He sighed irritatedly to himself and pulled down the hood of his cloak, knocking on the door more violently than he intended to in a burst of determination to fix the problems he had caused. 

Regret pooled in him while waiting for the door to open, he had never been closer to turning around and running away in his life when it finally opened and Ravi peeked his head out, looking completely shocked to see Angus standing there. 

“I can't believe you actually came,” Ravi managed, the look of total shock still plastered all over his face. Angus crossed his arms over his chest and raised a brow. 

“Did you have that little faith in me?” he joked, despite the fact that he had been scared for his life and considered running away just moments earlier. He was still terrified, but with Ravi here, he had to put on the old act he used to. 

“No, I mean, well…” Ravi was stammering, completely caught off guard until he took a breath and composed himself. “Did you want to come in?” 

Angus only nodded, because he didn't feel compelled to say either yes or no. He wiped his muddy hooves off on the doormat before coming inside, glancing around the small, pleasant dwelling. It was much like Ravi's childhood house, the one Angus remembered visiting ever so frequently. 

“I wasn't very prepared for any visitors, sorry the place is a bit of a mess, would you like me to make some tea or anything?” Ravi questioned, a bit frenzied, even though the place looked perfectly in order. 

“No, I’m alright,” Angus mumbled, still letting his gaze wander absently. He saw some old pictures of Ravi and Angus’ sister together when she looked to be a younger teenager, Ravi and his mom, Ravi in his conductor’s suit as he stood in front of a train with a bright smile. Two plaques of certification framed and hung neatly next to one another. So many things Angus missed out on. 

“Hey, actually, why don't we sit on the back porch? I was going to go out there and watch the moons rise. They're supposed to be aligning tonight,” Ravi suggested. Angus agreed because Ravi seemed anxious about having Angus in here, and Angus was beginning to feel saddened at the reminder of what he had to leave behind. 

They went outside together, Ravi carrying a cup of tea that he had made for himself before Angus arrived. They sat down on the steps of the back porch, looking up at the darkening sky as stars began to twinkle. It was cloudy, the remnants of the earlier storm still sticking around and blocking the moonrise from view. 

The both of them sat there for a while, trapped in a long, awkward silence. It was Angus who eventually said something, arms resting on his knees as he leaned forward on the steps. “So, how have things been?” 

Ravi took a sip of his tea, eyes unmoving from the sky as Angus glanced over to him. “They've been okay, lately. It was hard in the beginning. But everything has been going well for the most part. Marjorie has outbursts sometimes, and since you left… she's soured a lot more. I just worry for her. I feel like you'd be the only one that understands how she's feeling.” 

Angus sighed as he remembered the way in which he and his sister were raised, how much he had to take care of her. He left her behind when she needed him most. He cursed himself under his breath, hand pressed against his face in his frustration. She was growing sour and bitter, just like their father, because of Angus. “I would know how she's feeling. Angry at me. And that's making her angry at the world,” Angus muttered, ashamedly, as he always spoke around Ravi. “I don't even know if she'd want to see me again.” 

“Of course she would,” Ravi began hastily, sounding completely sure of himself. “She might yell at you for a couple hours, but I think she would be very glad to have you in her life again. You were her whole world. I know because she’s told me, however brief our conversations about you were. She loves you. She's angry at you for leaving but she'll forgive you if you make it up to her.”

Angus scoffed, half amused. “How would I make it up to her? Her Highness would have me working my tail off for the rest of my life as an indentured servant. Don’t you remember how we'd pretend to be her butlers when she was younger? I can't imagine her changing very much past that.” 

Ravi chuckled a little, taking a small sip of his tea. “She hasn't changed very much at all in that regard. And… It would take a while, but if you just work to let her know that you love her and are sorry for leaving her, she'll forgive you in time. You know her, though. She'll never forget.” 

Angus stared down the steps and into the grass below. He did know. 

“Oh, look,” Ravi breathed, after a beat of silence, his gaze directed up to the sky. 

Angus glanced up to see the supermoon peeking over the clouds; the purple and blue light finally aligned to result in the swirled mixture of color. Angus remembered how Ravi and his mom used to invite Angus and his sister over for the holiday to eat the sweet treats she would make and admire the moon together. He wondered if Ravi looked back on those memories as fondly as Angus did, or if Angus had ruined them. 

As if Ravi could read his mind, he set his tea down on the step and went back inside, saying he'd be back and he was grabbing something. He came back out with a small dish of sel roti that he said his mother had made for him to celebrate the harvest moon, offering to share it with Angus. 

He gladly enjoyed the crispy delights, its taste taking him back to those fleeting happy moments. He felt calmness roll over him, a wave of relaxation, when he realized he was sitting next to one of the few people he had ever felt safe with in his lifetime. Even despite how much time had passed, Angus never stopped thinking about him or caring for him.

He had so many things he wanted to ask Ravi at that moment. He wished he could’ve asked every question on his mind, but he could only get out what was at the forefront of his thoughts. “Did you really miss me, like you said you did at the faire?” 

The pause between his answer wasn’t long, he answered as soon as he finished chewing, a hand covering his mouth as he did so. “Yes, I did,” he replied, sighing a little and casting his gaze downward while the blue-purple light of the moon washed over his features. Angus couldn’t take his eyes off him. “I know it sounds silly, but almost everything reminded me of you, as much as I tried to not think of you at all. Reminiscing hurt too much, because I thought that I’d never have the chance to see you again… I tried so hard to forget, but, well, it didn’t work out.” 

Angus furrowed his brows, conflicted. “I understand,” he mumbled, realizing why Ravi’s house had been so devoid of any appearance of Angus, filled with other memories in order to ward the ones with Angus away. He wanted to tell Ravi his truest thoughts, I never stopped thinking about you either, but he couldn’t. He was already falling back into old habits, choking down the sincere things he would desperately want to tell Ravi. “...I’m not going anywhere this time, I swear, I’ll make it up to her. And to you.” 

He would do anything to make up for all the lost time. They exchanged a brief glance, one in which Angus could see the doubtless glint in Ravi’s eyes, and he felt his resolve strengthen further. 

For the rest of the time that he was there, they chattered back and forth with one another, conversation turning to much more lighthearted topics, like reminiscing on their childhood friendship together, discussing some of the happier developments with Ravi, all until the moon reached its peak in the sky and the both of them were ready to retire for the night. They stood on Ravi’s back porch together, having trouble finding the right place to end their conversation. 

“...Well, goodnight, Angus. Are you sure you don’t need a place to stay tonight? My sofa’s not the most comfortable, but I think you could survive the night on it if you have nowhere else to go,” Ravi offered generously, although Angus shook his head. 

“Thank you, I appreciate it. I’ll manage, though. And thanks for having me over. It was good to see you again,” Angus replied, voice low. Ravi smiled a little, nodding in his agreement. He led Angus through his house once more and they finally parted on his front steps. They both gave tiny goodbye waves and Angus watched Ravi retreat into his house before beginning his trek through town. 

He hoofed along the quiet mainstreet, hands dug into his pockets, basking in the light of the beautifully aligned supermoon, trying not to smile to himself.